All the not so little things...
My silence has not been so golden. In fact I have been procrastinating hard. But when life gets busy, its the 'little' things that are the lifesavers...
There has been a box of organiser bunny ears on my dressing table for about 3 months. Everyday I look at them and will myself to attack the cable viper pit under my dressing table. And everyday I put it off, choosing instead to trip over said cables; dropping hair straighteners and smart watches as I go. I know it will take me 10 minutes. I KNOW my daily routine will be so much better without the mess of cables lurking, ready to take me and my hair straightener down. And yet I haven’t been able to bring myself to do it. Until today.
Today was the day I finally tackled the pit of cables underneath said dressing table. I now have a beautifully organised tech guru wonderland. All gadgets and their accessories neatly in their place. It is a miracle. A joy to behold. A feat of modern engineering that shall be celebrated by organisers the world over. It also hasn’t made me happy. Because I’ve realised it is not a victory of Maja against the chaos of life. It is in fact another indicator of just how out of control my procrastination really is. Allow me to explain…
The start of 2024 has been busy. No let me re-phrase that: it has been manic. A crazy work schedule, family health dramas and trying to keep up with the minion’s preschool requirements (extra mural sign ups, charity drives, red outfits for Valentine’s day, etc. etc.) mean I have lost sight of what I now realise are the (not so) little things.
Because as soon as life kicks off, all the good habits aka ‘little things’ that one has built into one’s day - the morning walk, the quality time glass of wine with your partner, the mani, yoga sesh, 8 hours of sleep - all fall to the wayside. These become expendables that we can skip to save time when life gets busy.
We cut into our sleep, miss our gym sessions and stop engaging in our creative outlets just so that we can stay on the hamster wheel of anxiety that engulfs us in times of overwhelm. We become shells of our former kick-ass selves, merely existing rather than living. And this is not a revelation. Everybody knows this is what happens when one or multiple sectors of your life are out of control.
But trying to re-introduce the good stuff back into your life once it’s fallen out is actually quite hard. Because bad habits really do die hard while good habits disappear in the blink of an eye. And these are actually the things that make you get to the all important stuff (like matching your daughter’s heart shaped clips with her croc jibbitz). Without them you are a machine that’s running on old oil.
But instead of just embracing the good stuff back into my life when the chaos dies down, knowing all these little habits benefit me both mentally and physically, I procrastinate. I get to the most ridiculous things on my to do list. So conquering the cables? My excuse for not getting back to my newsletter. Because the newsletter has now become the beast that I need to conquer. Where do I even start? What do I write about? What will you find interesting? What if it sucks and nobody reads it? The anxiety becomes so overwhelming that sorting out the cables becomes more important than feeding my soul. Bat sht crazy I know, but here we are.
Sorting out cables became more important than feeding my soul. Bat sh*t crazy I know but here we are.
Why do we do this? Why do we not prioritise ourselves and our maintenance - mind, body and soul? Why is it so easy to turn away and so hard to get back to our happy places? Having done the cables I can now tell you that once those cables were sorted, there was nowhere to go but return to the gym and my newsie and calling those friends I have been putting off calling. Because these are in fact not so little things. And no amount of ticks on the to-do list is going to make me feel the way a trip to endorphin-land will.
What makes me happy is taking the time to tap away, sharing my thoughts. And I need to feel semi-fulfilled on some level. In order to be a good wife, mother, friend, daughter etc. I can’t be running on cereal bowl fumes. These little things are what keep my world running. Whether this gets read or not, I have fed my soul. And procrastination does the exact opposite. It might give you a momentary tick box high, but seeing those organised cables won’t keep your soul satisfied. So I’m back and I hope you enjoy my rambles, going forward I’m hoping to keep to my weekly schedule. And if you don’t hear from me, know that I will be down some rabbit hole of cleaning my washing machine filter or arranging buttons in colour order. Not entirely useless but definitely not life changing. Go forth and find your real joy - you’ll be glad you made the effort.
Conquering your procrastination - a to do list that actually works…
Get your nails done - ha! You thought I was going to start with ‘write a to do list.’ But no! I am of the firm opinion that sexy nails lead to an organised life. There’s something about seeing them in front of you all the time that just makes you feel powerful and capable and gives you the push to want to do bigger and better things.
Sort out a drawer - any drawer. Stationary, cutlery, keys, mail. Any random drawer that has accumulated ‘the crap’, (you know the one). You will feel like a gladiator once done and energised to go forth and tackle the next thing. Hence my cable moment.
Journal and all that sh*t - It’s SO annoying because every self help guru talks about the journaling and the gratitude lists and morning pages and all that kak. Annoyingly they are right. Over a period of time you will feel more positive and grateful. Put the kettle on for a cup of tea and just write while you are waiting for it to boil. Write anything. On any scrap piece of paper. Just write, ‘I can’t wait for this kettle to boil’ over and over for 5 minutes. See how you feel afterwards…
Go for a walk. It doesn’t have to be THE GYM. But a walk in your hood, on the prom, the beach, a park or just through the streets will wake you up. Put your phone in your bag and really walk. Look up, into interesting buildings, shops or the people you pass. The movement will wake you up. South Africans are so guilty of car culture which does nothing for our perception of - and interaction with - the world. Get out of your bubble and see where your feet take you.
Icons: The Leg Lengthener
In my search to become more eco friendly I have been trying to isolate the key items that every fashion focused wardrobe needs and thus investing rather than splurging repeatedly season after season. So I’m going to start a list called ‘Icons,’ where every week I talk about an item that needs a coveted spot in every stylish wardrobe. This list is according to me, which like my friend Dani says is ‘based on absolutely zero official research, save for my own dedicated immersion into fashion.’ This week she has helpfully written a list of key items that every wardrobe needs. So I recommend a deep dive into her latest newsie titled: 8 Classics For Your Forever Wardrobe.
From my side, this week’s icon is what I like to call the ‘leg lengthener’. A delicious pair of jeans that comes with a comfy high waist, hugging the bum and hips, but enough of a straight leg that lengthens the legs whilst always feeling fashhun. It has a slightly tapered leg, not too close to a 70’s bellbottom, but enough to give it that Jane Birkin edge of nostalgia while keeping it modern. It works with any and all shoe types but really stands to attention with a pointy toed boot (again this according to me, myself and I).
I just feel like in a world awash with skinny, wide leg, ripped, boyfriend, girlfriend and shudder - bootleg - this is it. If you were to have one jean in your closet this is the one. I have had a blue, black and white pair for years and years and I keep getting comments on them when I step a trendy leg out the door. It’s a classic, so stop procrastinating and add it to your basket…
Clockwise from top:
Wide high jeans blue, R429, H&M. Wide high jeans grey, R429, H&M. Billie wide leg denim, R599, Poetry. Australian cotton blend high rise wide leg jean, R1499, Country Road at Woolworths. Billie wide leg denim, R599, Poetry. main inset image: Marine straight-leg high-waist jeans with pockets, R899, Zara
Love your writing style and your inspiration to take the little steps to get going again x
We missed you, great to have the newsie back!